The best things I've seen today

Click them in order. Listen. Smile. I never thought marching bands could be cool. I stand corrected.

Thoughts on shaving

Somewhere in the lowest circle of hell, in the Gillette Razor Lab, somebody knows an awful lot about my stubble. Here, wayward engineers - people who once wanted to solve important world problems - toil at understanding the delicate sciences of facial friction, shaving cream viscosity, and whisker shear. Demonic overlords with MBAs obsessively track "cost-per-shave," planning expensive marketing strategies, wooing shavers and sprouting teenagers with images of soothing blue gel and skin - skin which, for all intents and purposes, looks like it has never required a shave before. The MBA demons crack their ties like whips down upon the poor engineers while screaming, "Use less expensive metal! Do you want anybody to buy replacements? What's the matter with you? Quit being so damned efficient!"

How do I know this? I own a Gillette Mach 5.

These Gillette folks are smart. They know that the road to success is littered with failed businesses. Competing within non-viable business models has led many a lesser company, technology companies for the most part, straight into the crapper. Do you have any friends who purchase a new printer whenever they run out of ink? I do.

Like I said, these guys at Gillette are smart. The razors are fairly inexpensive, they're just expensive enough that chucking them out can't be justified.

What's that you say? The Quattro still working for you? 4 Blades? Are you kidding? That sucker's going to be obsolete soon. You might as well pony up and go Mach 5. And if, in a moment of complete insanity, you decide to entertain the idea of going with the battery-powered Mach 5 "Turbo Edition" - that stubble-raising micro-vibrating wonder of the consumer world - I urge you to recall that Procter and Gamble, the parent company of Gillette, also manufactures batteries.